Phantom's Keep
by DiamondBeast
Summary: Danny Fenton has never been normal. So what's to stop him from having another Dad who just happens to be himself, another Sister- who's actually his clone- and being the Prince of all ghosts? Vlad and his new best friend, of course. DxS
1. Guessing Games

"Working on a new book?" Danny Phantom touched down on the cold library floor of the ghost zone and smiled at the resident librarian and author. The Ghost Writer looked up.

"Yes, actually- who'd you guess?"

"I followed the smell of an overworked keyboard and burnt ink."

The Ghost Writer frowned. He did not type that fast. Danny caught the look and smirked playfully.

"I'm kidding. I heard you typing, that's all. What's the book about?"

"You don't want to know."

"Oh, come on!" Danny floated up next to him, pretending to read over his shoulder, though in truth he couldn't read Ghost. The writer hunched over instinctively, pushing Danny away.

"No, I'm serious- you read it now and you get sucked in."

"It can't be that good, if it's just a rough draft." Danny reached for the translate button.

"I meant it literally."

"Oh." Danny paused, his finger over the button. He retracted it quickly. "Can you at least tell me what it's about?"

"It's kind of about you."

"Kind of? How so?"

"Well, you're not the only one who's been to other dimensions. I'm writing about that version of you."

"What's he like?"

"That's the part that you really do not want to know." The Ghost Writer resumed typing, leaving Danny to think it over.

"How many guesses do I get?"

"As many as you want- you'll never, not in a billion years, figure it out."

"I'm . . . a girl?"

"No." Tap type tap tap tap.

"A . . . animal of some sort."

"Nope." The Ghost Writer popped the p.

"I'm a . . . mermaid."

"God, no. That's a hideous image, Daniel."

"Don't call me that! Wait- I'm a vampire!" That typing paused.

"What brought that on? And no." The typing resumed, filling the background with taps and clicks.

"Well, Vlad's the only one who ever actually calls me that, and he's a vampire ghost."

"Well . . . I suppose that makes sense, in a weird, twisted, teenage sort of way . . ."

"Shut up. I'm . . . Goth?"

"You're just getting desperate."

"Fine then. I'm older?"

"No."

"Younger?"

"NO! It has nothing to do with your age!"

Danny began to pace, soft thumps accompanying the clicking now.

"Does it have anything to do with my family?"

The Ghost Writer paused. "No."

"My classmates?"

"No."

"Lancer?"

"No. Are you just avoiding the obvious answer?"

Danny ignored him. "My friends?"

"Yes." He sighed. Danny grinned and stopped pacing to put a hand behind his hand and hold up a fore-finger imperiously.

"Ah-ha!" He began to pace again. "Now, does it involve only Sam and tucker, or other people I consider friends?"

"Only Sam and Tucker." The older ghost sighed. God, this boy was dense. It was a miracle he'd been able to weasel away all the other ghosts so far.

"Okay . . . uh, I'm ruling the world, and they're still my best friends."

It took everything the Ghost Writer had to not slam his head against the keyboard in front of him. Was this boy truly that thick? It didn't make sense- he always knew the right answer, always did the right thing- how did he manage to wake up in the morning and not put his pants on backwards?

"No. Just no."

"Uh . . . okay, we're worst enemies in this other dimension you speak of."

"No." He sighed, his frustration making the words appear on the screen even faster.

"Okay, there goes horror. Um, we're all made of Jell-o."

"Daniel, you may be the hero of the both zones, but the heck are you getting these things?"

"Over there." Danny pointed to the poster on the end of the bookshelf nearest to them. On it were different genres. Ghost Writer sighed, seeing the correct answer near the bottom. This would take awhile.

"Okay, that was humor, now for history. We're all in the dark ages?"

"No."

"Fantasy- I'm half fairy instead of ghost?"

"No, but can you imagine Skulker fairy?"

"Please, you're giving me nightmares. Next up, mystery. We're detectives."

"No."

"Sci-Fi. Aliens have invaded!" Danny gasped, put his hands up to his cheeks and swaying dramatically.

"I am NOT going to answer that one."

"You're no fun. Romance . . ."

"Yees?" This would be interesting. What would Danny think of? Surely he couldn't miss this one.

Danny flushed bright green for a moment, the ectoplasm inside him pumping furiously in embarrassment. He quelled it quickly, his words rushing out much too fast to be normal.

"Uh, um, uh, Mom and Vlad are together?" He gulped.

The Ghost Writer just smiled. So this was the real reason Danny refused to admit that he liked her. _**It**_ might've already happened, almost ruining their friendship- if he wasn't already working on something, he'd definitely be writing a little behind-the-scenes report about this.

"No."

"Um, Sam . . ." He flushed even brighter, his cheeks glowing. "Dangit, can't you just tell me what it is?"

"No, and . . . done!" Ghost Writer put the finishing word on the document and sealed it, successfully turning it into a book instantly, the words, 'Danny Phantom, Dimensional Hero: Book Four' written across the front.

"Can I read it?"

"Tell me what the answer is. You know it."

"''reinloveco'monmandon'!" Danny pleaded, whimpering it all out in one breath. Smirking, Ghost Writer tossed his the book, which Danny deftly caught and flipped open.


	2. Phantom's Keep Revealed

"Oh . . . oh, my god."

"I told you again and again that you wouldn't want to read it."

Danny dropped the finished book, having read it twice over, still not believing it.

"Well, I hadn't thought it would be quite like this!"

"You never think, that's your problem."

Danny ignored him, his eye twitching, the truth of it finally sinking in. He whirled on Ghost Writer.

"You can't publish this!"

"I could."

"You can't!"

"It just wouldn't be very nice." Ghost Writer thought it over, the options turning over in his head. Finally, he sighed and handed the book back to Danny.

"Fine, then, **you** keep it. If you keep it in your lair, no one will ever know the difference."

"But they're bound to find it in my room." Danny rubbed the back of his neck.

"Your lair, stupid, not your room. You know, Phantom's Keep?"

"But there is no Phantom's Keep."

"You won Pariah's Keep when you battled him. You also won the crown, but that doesn't matter until you're of age. Put it in the library- I know for a fact it has one- and keep it there. No one will ever know."

"Except me."

"Well, yeah."

"Okay. I'll do it." Danny jumped up, floating in front Ghost Writer and made a face. "Each lair fits the needs of the ghost who owns it, right? So it won't be all deathly and creepy, right? It'll have transformed or something?"

"Hopefully so." The purple ghost pulled up a new file and began typing another story.

"Got it." And with that, the young hero flew off.

~DP~

"Wow."

Wow was right. Pariah's lair had completely transformed from the awful mountain it had been before to a much more fairytale-like castle. Mostly a silvery-gray, it had black flags with the oh-so-famous DP on them in white, resting atop black-shingled, narrow towers. It floated completely alone on a rock, a medium sized courtyard in the front to serve as a receiving pad.

Classy, huh?

"Now to find the library . . . " Danny stuck out his tongue and opened the door. Made expertly of black wood, it had silvery-white knockers and handles, polished by unseen hands to perfection. Kicking off, he pushed off the ground and began to float slowly in, closing the door behind him. The receiving hall was amazing. He hadn't noticed it before, but two large windows on either side of the door were rimmed in the same black wood as the door, with enormous curtains that swept down to brush against the floor. He touched the white material softly, smiling at the softness. What was it . . . silk? _Cotton_, maybe? Jazz would know. He went back to floating towards the large, doorless frame at the opposite end of the hall, ignoring the enormous silver-gray staircases going up from either side of him to the next floor in his quest. The black frames were intricately carved in silver, filling the void that could've been boring. He stepped into a long gray stoned corridor, tapestries lining the walls. No library in here.

"Hello . . ." he whispered into the empty space. This place wasn't all that creepy, but it would be a bit more tolerable if there were more people than just him. "Hn."

He opened the first door on his left, one of the few in the hallway. The scent of old paper and slightly burnt candles hit him just before the sight of what had to be more than a thousand books did.

It was spectacular- tomes and volumes upon volumes of every subject you could imagine, all contained on enormous wooden shelves- black, unsurprisingly. The floor was suddenly covered in white carpet, and the silver-cushioned armchairs were placed just beneath the candle-holders on the walls, with more in the center clearing of the room. Looking closer, Danny could see that there were ectogreen throw pillows on the chairs. He closed the door lightly behind him and began to look for a place to hide the book he currently held.

History section . . . he stuck out his tongue and walked by.

Fantasy . . . no. A story like this just didn't belong here. He walked on.

Sci-fi, biographies, fiction, he walked past them all. There wasn't really a place to put the book.

"Well, that's just . . ." He trailed off, finally having reached the back corner of the library. There was a window seat stretching across the corner, the glass behind it clear and unperturbed. The ectogreen cushioned seated was large enough to hold two people, either side by side or stretched out. The shelf above it was empty, save a few three-ring binders and books similar to the one he was holding.

". . . great!" Hopping up and floating to the shelf up above, he tucked it in between two binders marked 'Violet Haze' and 'Amethyst Ocean'. At the sight of the word Amethyst, though, he began to blush, remembering a passage of the very book he was trying to get rid of.

"_Danny . . ." She whispered, her breath making him shiver, her beautiful amethyst eyes boring into his, reading his soul. He laughed softly._

"_Sam . . ." He pressed his lips back onto hers, closing his eyes, their lashes fluttering together. The moon still shone brightly down onto the covers bunched up around them, splattering them with white light. His hands moved down, freeing her arms, his fingers finding her waist and flipping her onto him. He pressed her closer to his body, grinding their waists together, moving his hips to the beat of an unheard tune._

_All because of those Amethyst eyes._

Stop it, Mind. You are dredging up memories from-

**-From the part of your mind you cherish the most-**

- FROM the darkest parts of Hell. Now, Danny thought, what to do. Do I tell Sam? Should I not tell her? Should I lead her to the book- no, lend her the book? Should I forget about it? CAN I forget about it?

While he was fuming, back in Amity Park, a few certain people were getting worried.

"He said he was just going to visit an ally or two!" Jazz slammed her un-read textbook shut in frustration. The younger two sighed.

"Yeah. I mean, what could possibly be happening over there? Nothing's been signifying an attack, and it's not like he'd just forget . . ." Tucker slurped angrily at his slurpie. Sam laughed in her sarcastic way.

"Guys, I'm sure he's fine. He probably just got a little . . . sidetracked!"

"You keep telling yourself that. You just don't want to admit that your boyfriend's gone missing." Tucker chewed a bit on his straw. Her gaze suddenly turned cold, turning the Nasty Burger's booth's atmosphere to hypothermic proportions, though she kept the twisted smile.

"Nonsense, Tucker. Besides," Her face darkened, and Tucker gulped as her hands clenched into fists, "People don't count as missing until their gone for twenty-four hours. Lesse . . . that gives you exactly, hm, twenty-one and a half hours until the police start looking for you when I'm done torturing you."

"Sam, let's be reasonable." Jazz lay her hands atop each other on her textbook. "We all know that Danny can handle himself, so he **did** probably just get sidetracked. And Lancer said you didn't even need pencils tomorrow, right? He won't be missed. I'd say," She checked her watch, "That we'll all be together, right here in this very booth, at this time tomorrow."

"What time is it, anyway?" Tucker smiled, grateful for the distraction.

"5:30."

"Crud! My parents are gonna kill me! I gotta run!" He chugged the rest of his slurpie and ran out the door. Sam gulped.

"I might not enjoy following my parents orders, but it's Mom's birthday today and she'll kill me if I'm late to dinner. Bye, Jazz!" She sprinted off, following the same smoking track Tucker left. Jazz sighed.

'_Come home soon, little brother. I don't think we'll last much longer.'_


	3. Hey, Is That Chocolate?

"Okay, so I don't tell her. I just forget about it completely. Okay." Danny flopped onto the window seat, glad to have finally gotten that over with. "What time is it, anyway?" He checked behind him, sucking in his upper lip when he realized it had to be past seven. The green swirling lights outside were much slower, becoming dimmer at the same time, and there were fewer ghosts out and about.

Jazz was going to kill him.

Then hunt down his ghost and tear him apart molecule by molecule.

That is, of course, unless he waited to go back until she was so worried she forgot to be mad. Yeah, that'll work. Tucker wouldn't be fazed by his absence; just gloat about how much higher his DOOM score was now. Sam . . . oh. That was a toughie. She would just get madder the longer he was gone, and there wasn't anything to do about it otherwise. Hmm . . .

"_Where were you? We looked forever, and we still couldn't find you . . ." A tear slipped down her cheek, which he brushed away with his thumb._

"_I don't know . . . all I could see was black, and the only thing I could think about was how you weren't there." His soft smile morphed into a roguish grin and he pinned her to the wall. "And," He kissed her, pressing his lips to hers, slipping his tongue out to taste the grape of her lip gloss, "It's only forever if it never ends . . . I'm here now, aren't I?"_

"_But . . . but, how-"_

"_How much do I love you? Why, Sam!" He chuckled, running his thumb down her jawbone, "I thought you knew . . ." He kissed her again._

_He always knew how to make her forgive._

"WOAH!" Back in reality, of course, he was not so easily pleased. _'Dangit, mind! Why do you torture me so? I DO NOT want to remember that book!'_

"Anyway . . . "He scratched the back of his neck, _'If I'm gonna stay away long enough to make Jazz spaz out, then I need to find a place to sleep . . .'_

He floated out of the library, shaking his head to get rid of the images still in his head. A guy doesn't need to see his best friend like that repeatedly. Going back out the door to the lobby, he yawned. _'Dang! And I've only fought the box ghost today! I _**do**_ need sleep . . .'_

He dropped down and kept walking, dragging his feet up the stairs and all the way down the upper corridor to large silver door with carvings on it in black marble. Seemed a good enough place to check out . . . he opened the door and held in a gasp.

Now, reader, I need you to do something for me. I need you to imagine the most spectacular, amazing, spacious room you've never tried to even think about, ever. Danny's room is all that times ten.

"Oh-ho-ho-ho! This place ROCKS!" He leapt up onto the bed, which had black covers with white lining on it. The soft mattress sank to accommodate him before bouncing back up to a slightly mashed squishiness when he rolled up to his pillows. Huge, extremely fluffed up ectogreen pillows, they made perfect landing pads. Without even bothering to change or check out the rest of the room, he fell asleep.

~DP~

"_Danny . . . Danny *giggle* stop that!" Sam was laughing too hard to really be understood, so Danny could only hear garbled pieces of English as he tickled. _

"_Stop what, Sammy-pants? This?" He blew a raspberry against her exposed stomach, sending her off again._

Danny rolled over in his sleep, pulling the covers over him instinctively.

"_So, Sam . . ." He ran his tongue up her jawbone and dribbled kisses down her neck, "Am I being annoying now?" His tongue slipped out again and he smiled slightly as she shivered at his touch, "Am I being obnoxious?" His head dipped down and she gasped slightly. He came back up, grinning. "Am I being intrusive?"_

Danny nose twitched, and he breathed in again.

"_Sam, open the frigging window. It's freezing out here."_

"_Why didn't you just phase through?"_

"_Because," He grinned, "Then I wouldn't be able to do this."_

_The shrieking and giggling didn't end until hours later._

"Ungh . . ." Danny sighed in his sleep.

After hours of the repeated dreams, he woke up, squinting his eyes near shut against the bright green light pouring into his room.

"Dang. Morning already?" He pushed himself up and stretched, arching his back before flopping over and thinking. _'What to do, what to do . . . oh!' _He sat up. "Clockwork! I haven't gone to him yet . . ."

He hopped up and straightened his HAZMAT suit before swishing a hand through his hair and zooming downstairs, out the door, and towards the swirling green area that sparked with an insane amount of ecto-energy. Clockwork, being Clockwork, had worked his magic to make it look as though his enormous towers were appearing from a fog whenever someone came within thirty feet of it. '_Now,_' thought Danny, and evil smirk appeared, _'If the range were smaller, say, five feet, then a ghost wouldn't see it until he had a broken nose.'_

But, of course, Clockwork wouldn't do that. Naw. Of course not- the super powerful ghost, Master of all time, annoyer of the Observants and Shaker-of-Dan's-Thermos, committing a heinous prank like that?

Shameful.

He dropped to the ground as he flew through the open door and ran into the control room, whirring gears and hourglass floating on the walls. He hopped onto the floor-gear with Dan on it and sat under the table.

'_5 . . . 4 . . . 3 . . . 2 . . . 1' _

"Hello, Danny Phantom."

"Sup, Clockwork?"

"Must you always butcher English so?" Clockwork floated just above him, leaning over to look at Danny.

"May-be."

"I suppose you're wondering-"

"Yes. Yes I am." Danny smiled innocently at the much older ghost, who raised an eyebrow in wait.

"Well . . ?"

"One: Why do I have a house, two: Why is it so friggin' **big**, three: Do you have any food that won't kill me the rest of the way?"

"Go look in the kitchen. Cookies are fresh from the oven." Clockwork floated over to his screen and began sorting through the pictures as Danny broke the speed of sound back to the main hall.

"Manohmanohmanoh- Hey, waitaminute." Danny paused. "WHERE'S THE KITCHEN?"

"Danny? Izzat you?" A feminine voice came from behind him.

"Hello?" He spun slowly around. This was highly unnecessary, as he was bowled over instantly by a bright green streak, followed closely by a black and white one.

"BARK BARK BARK!"

"DANNY!"

"Dani? Cujo? What the heck are you guys doing here?" Danny was still pinned to the floor by the two squirming figures, though now he could see who they were.

"Why, cousin dear, I could ask you the same thing!" She giggled, and he could smell frosting on her breath. "Did you know that Clockwork is possibly the best baker in the entire universe?"

"I can smell that, doofus. I'm here about my castle- hey, is that _chocolate_ frosting?"

"Yup!" She giggled again and let him up. "C'mon, the kitchen over here!" The two zipped towards it. Once he had stuffed what had to be five cookies into his mouth and swallowed, he began to speak again.

"Okay, why are you here?" He and Dani stuffed another cookie into their mouths and she answered, licking frosting (Which was indeed chocolate) off of her fingers.

"Well," Lick, "I come to Clockwork sometimes to ask him," Lick, "where I haven't been yet, and he'll give me a new country," "or landmark to go look at."

"And Cujo?"

"_That's_ his name? Geez, I thought it'd be something like Spike or Fluffy."

"That's a cat's name."

"God, what a scary name. But I can see where it's coming from. Anyway, he's just been following me around and sniffing me like crazy."

"That'd be because you smell like me."

"Gee, thanks for the compliment." Danny ignored his clone's sarcasm and reached into his pocket.

"And-" He pulled out an indistinguishable pink object- "He knows that I have this."

He felt o the floor covered in ecto-slobber, chocolate frosting and a giant ghost dog that had his entire arm in its mouth.

"It thought I had its chew toy?" Dani jumped up to pry her cousin of the ground.

"His squeaky, yes. He also thinks that I'm his master, because when he first came of here I took care of him."

"So why aren't you his master?" Dani was only slightly less clueless than Danny was and picked up on the slight.

"Because he managed to destroy an entire factory, therefore getting the security manager fired, therefore getting rid of Damien Gray's job, and ending up getting Valeria Gray, Damien's daughter, to hate me."

"And this matters because . . . "

"You know who Valerie is- the Red Huntress? Ring any bells?"

"OH YEAH! So Cujo is responsible for that?"

Said dog had now morphed back into a puppy and was chewing vigorously on the squeaky toy.


	4. Cujo Phantom

Danny grinned.

"Yeah. But now that I think about it, Valerie probably would have hated me anyway. So-" He hefted Cujo up, who didn't let go of the toy and tried to let out a happy yelp, "I might as well make him mine, don't you think?"

"Duh. Well, go on!" Dani waved him on, licking the very last of the frosting off of her fingers and dumping the rest of the cookies in a tan ceramic jar that said 'MONEY' on it in big brown letters. Danny smiled as twisted the tags on Cujo's collar to face backwards before generating a very small ectobeam and carving

'Cujo Phantom'

'Property of Danny Phantom'

'If found, return to Phantom's Keep'

"There!" He nuzzled his nose into Cujo's fur before making a face and looking up at Dani. "What have you been doing to him?"

"Oh, that? Well, he started following me right after I left France, so I figured that he just liked my perfume. So I gave him some."

"And what exactly was this perfume supposed to smell like?"

"Dolce & Gabbana."

"Which is . . ?"

"How should I know?"

"Ugh. At least it's not Boogers, or whatever it is Sam uses to annoy her parents."

The two began to laugh, knowing it would be just like Sam to wear something as horrible as 'Boogers' just to mess with her parents. Cujo barked along, smiling to get into the fun. Clockwork appeared in the doorway; face a mask, as usual.

"If you two are done, I have to show you something." He floated back out.

The two on the floor looked at each other before following him out.

"What is it?"

"Yeah, what is it?"

"Is it good?"

"Is it bad?"

"Is it Dan?"

"Yes."

"Is it- wait, what? It's Dan? He's OUT?" Danny nearly had a heart attack.

"No."

"Then- "

"I have a way to fix him. Watch this." Clockwork waved his hand, changing the scene on his Time Viewer. (TV for short.)

"This is when Dan was created. See- your ghost half and Vlad Plasmius mixed. However, if done correctly, he can be separated back to his original forms and we can get rid of his evil entirely." He played the scene, careful to not show any of the really gory parts for the sake of Dani.

"And . . ?"

"_And _we'll be able rid you of any possibility of becoming Dark Dan."

"Sweet! Where do we start?" Dani, of course, was not one to be left out, despite not knowing a whit about it.

"I am going to do this by myself. I have enough power, thank you. I was just warning you." Clockwork grabbed the thermos and began towards his 'Hazard' workshop, only to have the two young ghosts stop him.

"Just like that? You're kidding, right?" Danny was indignant.

"He's right. You can't just go 'Whoosh, hey we're going to stop the evilest person in the universe! Yes, really! Okay, well, bye!' No way, man. Uh-uh." The two crossed their arms. Clockwork seemed to suppress a smile. The two were more alike than they realized.

"There are sprinkles in the cabinet above the sink and information about Dani that not even Vlad knows in the black book on the shelf."

The much, much younger two were off like shots and Clockwork beat a hasty retreat to the workshop. After a lot of sprinkles, a lot of frosting and a ton of cookies, they finally consulted the book. The pages were musty, with scrawling penmanship that was all old English, though still relatively easy to read. The ink was rusty in color, and on the parchment paper it looked like Davinchi's sketches and notations. Halfway through the book, they still hadn't found the page about Dani. There was one about every other ghost, every other ghost zone item, place and rumor, and they still couldn't find theirs. Finally, Danny shut the book entirely.

"Danny! There were at least a hundred pages left!" Dani tried to open it again, but Danny stopped her.

"Dani, we've been here for what- hours?"

"-MAYBE one hour-"

"-And we still haven't found our pages. We're never gonna find them at this rate."

"That doesn't mean we should stop trying!" She dove for the book, not quite managing to wrench it away completely when Danny gripped it tighter and started a tug of war.

"Give it!"

"YOU give it!"

"NUAAGH!"

"BLEAGH!" Dani stuck out her tongue and let go suddenly, hoping for the shock to make Danny drop it. Success- however, she wasn't fast enough either, and the book hit the floor before flopping open.

Straight to their pages.

"That was unexpected." Danny twisted his mouth as Dani dropped to it and began reading.

"NAME: Danielle Madeline Phantom-Fenton

"DANGER LEVEL: Six

"OCCUPATION: Protector of Spare Portals-"

"Spare portals?" Danny cut her off, leaning over the book. "What are those?"

"Wild Portals. Frostbite lets me use the Map in order to protect them. Now shut up!" She continued to read, pushing him away slightly. He just huffed and sat back, his knuckles brushing the floor lightly.

"Dani . . ."

"Hush! Now, lesse . . . mm-hmm, mm-hm. Holy Cow!" She stopped reading suddenly and jerked up.

"What?" Danny was up in a second. She looked at him, still shocked.

"I'm your-"

"WOO-HOO!" Something that was either an explosion or something close to it rumbled through the tower. A bright flash of light followed, and suddenly both of them were wrapped up in an enormous hug. "BEST DAY EVER!" They were rocked from side to side. They tried to share a look, but the two were blocked by black HAZMAT.

"Uh . . ." Danny said, confusedly.

"Meet Dan, Daniel." Clockwork was actually smiling now, well, smirking, at them.


	5. Explanations

**I APOLOGIZE FOR THE CLIFFHANGER. I AM SADLY ADDICTED TO THOSE. I FIND THEM AMUSING.**

"So . . . what you're saying is that this person-whom-I-refuse-to-think-of-as-Dan is . . . Dan?"

"That is exactly what I am saying." Clockwork tried and failed not to smirk. (Again.)

The four were now sitting in the dining room, sharing a large plate of cookies. However, only Danny and Clockwork were focused on the matter at hand. Dani was still staring in shock at Dan, who was discovering the wonders of chocolate-chip cookies with frosting and sprinkles.

"And how exactly did that happen?" Danny raised an eyebrow.

"Well, see, when two creatures of opposite genders come together, they kinda-" Clockwork was stopped suddenly, overcome with silent laughter at the sheer horror that was gracing Danny's face.

"Oh my freaking **god**, Clockwork. That is so not what I meant, it isn't even funny. Just tell me what the heck happened to make Dan so different, 'kay?" Clockwork, wiping tears from his eyes, finally answered.

"I told you earlier. I removed Vlad from Dan and he reverted back to what you will become." Clockwork snagged a cookie. Danny switched emotions again. His constantly changing faces were really quite hilarious.

"So you're saying that I'm gonna have flaming hair when I grow up?" Danny looked out the corner of his eye at Dan. Now that he had lost the red eyes (They reverted back to green), the green skin, and the cape was gone (Don't ask where it went), he looked just like an older version of Danny in ghost form.

Expect that his head was on fire.

It was on a much smaller scale now, of course. And now it actually looked classy instead of just crazy.

"And so, since the evil is banished and he is fully a phantom, he will go to live with you and Dani at Phantom's Keep." Clockwork sipped tea out of a mug that said 'I don't have time for this but I'm drinking it anyway' on the side. Danny just lapsed deep into thought.

'_Well . . . nobody in this time knows that Dan's actually evil, so this might actually work . . . but . . . no, wait . . . yeah- no, no, no . . .' _Out of pure curiosity, he glanced over to Dan, only to be horrified all over again.

"NO, DAN, NO! BAD DAN! DO NOT SHARE COOKIES WITH CUJO, DAMMI-"

"Danny!" Dani latched onto him, interrupting his tirade. The message was sent, however, and Dan stopped feeding Cujo the chocolate. Dani shook him.

"Danny, I heard Clockwork say that we're all gonna go live together. Izzat true?" She shook him again, though it wasn't intentional. The sugar was reaching her system, and it was all she could to not spontaneously combust.

"Actually, yeah." Danny held back a laugh at the face Dani made, a mix between confusion and excitement. "We're all gonna go live at this place called 'Phantom's Keep'. It's so huge; we could probably fit Amity Park inside." The two laughed.

If only they knew.

"Okay, I'm convinced. This is my room." Danny smiled. The four Phantoms - Cujo included – had made their way back to the keep and were now establishing territory. Danny had chosen the room he had slept in last night almost immediately, and Cujo claimed the much smaller room next to it seconds after. From the size and placement of it, it had probably been servants quarters back when it was Pariah's Keep. Nobody minded though, so the two just hounded after the other two to finish. Dani was quickly losing patience. Dan was a whole other story.

". . . On the other hand, this one is far away from the stairs it'll take too long to walk anywhere . . . and on another hand, this room is nice and secluded . . . but on the other hand . . ."

"Geez," Dani whispered to Danny, "You'd think he was getting a manicure." She had finally picked a room and was now helped to bug Dan. Her room was near identical to Danny's, with a few feminine touches. It was right next to his, the third door down on the right. Cujo's was actually closest to the stairs.

Finally, after several cookies stolen from clockwork and a couple of games of chess (They found a set in Danny's room), Dan picked his room. It was right across from the others, first door down on the left, and was absolutely identical to Danny's; save the fact that it seemed sleeker. Oh, it was only a few touches here and there, but it excluded maturity where Danny's didn't. Maybe it was the whole, 'no-nightlights' thing.

Who knows?

"Okay, so here's the plan!" Dan clapped his hands together for attention from the others. They had gathered in what they now dubbed the family room and were discussing what to do next. Cujo barked helpfully.

"We keep Danny here, so that Jazz'll end up freaking out, forgetting to yell at Danny. That's understood, correct?"

The others nodded.

"And Tucker won't care, correct?"

They nodded again.

"So, in order get Sam off all our backs, we need to sit her down and tell her the truth- Danny found this place and picked up the rest of us as he went along. Got it?"

This time, they all just worked out cricks out their necks- yes, they nodded again.

"Dani, Cujo, you tie down her legs. Danny and I will get her arms."

"Be very careful," Danny interjected, "Remember, she's always armed, with things that'll wound both ghosts and humans. Which leads us to the next order of business . . ." He looked pointedly at Dan.

"Can you turn into a human?"

Many, many fruitless tries later, Dan stopped trying and asked,

"Why on earth would I need to be human?"

"Isn't it obvious?" If the silence didn't answer him, the looks on their faces certainly did. He grinned.

"You're the only one here who's old enough to drive. With the reputation the Fenton Assault Vehicle has, we could pull who knows how many pranks without even going ghost!"


	6. Pass The Ketchup

In a bright red booth, the one closest to the door, two kids and their Dad were sitting and chatting amiably.

At least, that was what it looked like. In reality, Danny, Dani and Dan were all in ghost form, with black hoodie's pulled up to cover their hair. Cujo sat under the table, invisible, chewing on Danny's foot. They were waiting for Sam and Tuck to come in the door. The plan was that they would dive her as soon as she stepped through the threshold and fly her at super-speed to a portal. Namely the Fenton portal. If they had to grab Tucker too, that would be fine.

However . . .

The four were getting slightly distracted by a burning question: Could ghosts eat? To find out, they had Dan order three Nasty Burgers, one vanilla milkshake and two chocolates. As much as Dan wanted a chocolate one too, they figured it would help keep up the boring image to eat boring ice-cream. So far the experiment was going well. Dan who hadn't eaten anything in ten years and had only a couple fifty cookies earlier, so he was proving to have a healthy appetite. Dani was like that as well, having honed her eating skills to a sharp point through her days on the run. Danny trumped them both, even though he was the only one to eat on a regular basis. The food needs of a constantly-fighting teenage boy are highly under-exaggerated. And Cujo would phase through every so often to grab a couple of the fries they had ordered on their second round.

"Pass me the ketchup."

"Get it yourself."

"Dan- I mean, Dad, can you pass me the ketchup?"

"What's the magic word?"

"_Please_?"

"Here you go."

"**Thank **you." Dani sniffed at Danny, who ignored her in favor of his burger. They pulled off a family surprisingly well, despite the obvious blunders.

"Oh, wait, before I forget-" Danny gulped down the last of his milkshake and turned to Dani. "What was it you were saying earlier? You know, before Dan- I mean, Dad, tackled us?"

"Oh, that!" Dani grinned. "Turns out that, if I were to have a comparison to a position in your family other than clone, I'd be your younger sister. How sweet is that?"

Danny's face swept through another range of emotions (Confused, horrified, happy, gleeful, terror-stricken, etc. etc.) Before settling into a grin and he hugged her with one arm.

"You're right, that's totally sweet. But then again," His face contorted, "Now I have TWO sisters."

Dan laughed, but went back to stirring his milkshake. "You know, I think that if she were going to show up, Sam would have come in by now."

"Oh," the younger two chorused before looking at each other. Dani spoke first.

"Well, we could do a patrol and look for her. Or keep waiting."

"I say we call her." His face set with grim determination, Danny pulled out his cell phone and speed-dialed Sam. The others held their breath expectantly, fidgeting in their seats as the tone dial was sounding in his ear. Cujo whined and chewed on his foot nervously. Finally, she picked up.

"Hello, Sam."


	7. Flying Burgers and Dash's Posse

**AND A BIG HAND TO JEANETTE9A FOR THE IDEA BEHIND THIS CHAPTER**

As the very dysfunctional family was stewing in the corner at the hateful thing called voice mail, Dash Baxter was simmering lightly. His posse were all whispering about 'those weirdoes in the corner' and wondering who they were. He scrunched up his nose.

This was his turf. He was the popular one, not some family of freaks that came from nowhere. It was their job- everyone's job- to know he was in charge! And these guys just got fired.

"Hey, you!" He hopped up and loomed over their table. Dani, the one who'd thought to wear sunglasses over her very bright eyes looked up as the other two focused even more on the phone.

"What's up?"

"Who are you guys, just walking in here like you own the place?" He cracked his knuckles as Kwan called out behind him,

"YEAH!"

"We don't own this place. We're just here to eat. Is there a problem?" Danny spoke quietly, keeping his face down at the screen of his phone.

"You bet there's a problem! This is where my gang hangs, got it? Freaks like you don't belong here!"

"Looked in a mirror lately?" The Dad spoke up, his face also down, hiding a smile.

"Dad!" For once, Dani spoke correctly.

"You're embarrassing us, Dad! This is why we don't take you with us when we go out!" Danny grimaced. He really hoped that this wouldn't escalate.

It did.

"Yeah, you're embarrassing them! So why don't you and your boring kids just hightail it out of here?"

Danny slid his phone back in his pocket and answered in a voice just loud enough to carry to Dash's ears.

"Cause I'm still hungry." He got up and kneeled in the seat, facing over towards Dash's table, and without opening his eyes, called out. "Hey, you! With the black hair and jacket like this guy!" Kwan pointed to himself. "Yes, you! Look, if this guy is done with his sandwich, can I have it?" The co-coach of Casper High Football then did the stupidest thing anyone had ever done.

He picked up Dash's still unwrapped burger and threw it across the room.

Straight.

At.

Dash's.

Head.

It splattered across his blonde hair and made him as angry as a hornet, unfortunately. Kwan sank into his seat, hopefully out of the star's range. The Phantom family wasn't that lucky. He grabbed the collar of Danny's coat and yanked him up. Danny scrambled to keep his eyes and hair out of view as Cujo caught whiff of danger and reappeared next to them.

"Ha! Lookit! The dork's dumb dog is trying to save him!" Dash laughed, and the other popular's joined him.

Cujo grew full size and Dash's face was the definition of recognition.

"Wait, a minute!" Paulina jumped up. "That's Ghost Boy's dog!"

"So that means this is . . . " Dash yanked back Danny's hood, who went limp in defeat and opened his eyes slowly at the shocked teens.

"That's right, Danny Phantom. And I would've gotten away with it, too, if I hadn't been for you meddling kids." Dash dropped him back to the floor and he straightened up, running a hand through his hair. He looked back at Cujo, who was growling loudly. "Down, Cujo. Good boy." The now much smaller puppy jumped into his arms and he scratched behind his ears.

Valerie twitched. The ghost boy was so close! And he had to show up in a place she couldn't transform. Well, if she couldn't attack physically, she'd do it verbally.

"So, if you're the Ghost Boy," She spoke with his least favorite nickname, "Who are the others?" She was pretty sure the girl was Dani, but she wasn't sure.

"That's up to them if they want to tell you. Guys?" He turned to the others. The hopped up and stood next to him, pulling down her hood with one hand and the other taking away her sunglasses.

"Hi! I'm Dani Phantom. That's Dani with an I, so's to not make it very confusing. I'm his kid sister!" She grinned brightly and, as everyone was marveling at her sweetness, she slid Cujo away from Danny. Valerie raised an eyebrow at the kid sister part, but if he promised to take good care of her (At least he was feeding her.) then she could understand. Danny picked Cujo back and turned slightly so that Dani couldn't reach him. As she prepared to pounce, Dan stood between them and pulled of his hood.

"Hey, I'm Dan Phantom. Though you'll probably remember me as Danny Phantom's dad." He clapped a hand down on Danny's shoulder and grinned. The Nasty Burgers entire mass of people's jaws dropped.

"DANNY PHANTOM HAS A FAMILY?"

"That's our cue!" Danny put Cujo down, yanked his hood back up, and motioned for the others to do the same. Once their hair back in place. He waved and called out over the roar, "SEE YOU GUYS LATER!"

"No, wait!"

But the family had already taken off, sending off sparks of harmless ectoplasm as a bit of a side effect.

Later, after having arrived back at Phantom's Keep and relaxed in the room across from the library, which they'd dubbed the 'Family Room', Dani finally spoke.

"That went well."

And then Danny's phone rang.


	8. It's For You- Someone Called Death

"For cryin' out loud, guys! It's Sam! Dan," He looked at the older ghost seriously, "I nominate you answer it."

"I second that." Dani scootched away from the phone.

"Arf!"

"And I'm sayin' there ain't no way in hel-"

"Been there, done that. Where do you think we live, genius? Just pick up the friggin phone!"

"Fine! But after this you owe me big." Dan plucked the phone away from Danny and flipped it open. "Hello?"

The other end held deathly silence. But she spoke quietly and calmly.

"Daniel James Fenton. I am going to destroy you."

"Don't you mean kill?"

"No, I mean destroy. Because killing you means you might have a chance of survival. No. I am going to destroy you."

"Um . . . I'm sorry, you must have a wrong number." Dan gulped and handed off the phone to Danny as though it was on fire. Danny put his ear to it and said, squeakily,

"Hello, Sam?"

"Danny. I'll say the same thing to you that I said to that thing that I assume is Good Dark Dan. I'm going to destroy you. Slowly, painfully, and with a perverse amount of pleasure on my part."

Her last sentence brought up several different passages from the book he was trying so hard to forget, and he blushed heavily. Dani and Dan just looked at each other in a very 'What-the-heck'-ish sort of way.

"Um, Sam, I can explain . . ."

"Oh, I don't doubt you can. I might actually get a good laugh from this. Go ahead."

"It's all my fault."

A surprised silence rang from the other end, and he thumbed-up the other Phantoms. They clapped wildly, turning their palms intangible in order to not make a whole lot of noise.

"Excuse me?"

"It's all my fault. I went to visit Ghost Writer, he told me about how Pariah's Keep turned into Phantom's Keep, which is awesome, by the way, I took too long exploring it and I fell asleep. Then I went to visit Clockwork to ask about the Keep, where I picked up Dani and Cujo, and Dan, surprisingly." Dan glared at him, but Danny continued. "After that, he decided who got which room in Phantom's Keep, which is awesome, by the way, and got hungry. So we went to the Nasty Burger to go eat and wait for you and Tuck, but you didn't show. And then, well, you know the rest. Where were you?"

"Asking around if people had seen Danny Phantom. I was going to go there, but when you didn't show up at school . . ."

"Looks like you just missed us. Out of completely-unrelated curiosity, what exactly would you have done to me if you'd found me before I explained?"

"I'd have done very many things, mostly concerning a very painful technique I learned from Grandma about how to stuff a living person into a normal-sized blender. But you know what?"

"What?"

"I never said I wasn't going to do it."

She could feel his fear through the phone, and though he trying to muffle the sound with his hand, she heard him speak to the other two.

"Pack your bags. We're going to the moon."

"DANNY!"

"Hi?"

"You don't have to go to the moon. I'm not going to hurt you." She thought the rest of her sentence deep within her subconscious. '_**That**__ badly . . ._ '

"Okay. Sounds legit." He waved to the others to signal that it was okay, and they instantly relaxed. "Do you want me to come back out into the real world anytime soon, or can you not stand to look at me?"

"Oh, Danny. Even if you managed to blow half your face off, I'd still be able to look at you just fine." Her tone was nothing but annoyed at his sarcasm, but he still he to turn his face so the others couldn't see his blush. Though he couldn't remember the words to that scene in the book entirely, he recalled that it involving a lot of . . . _touching_, on her part.

"Okay. C-cool, thanks for not killing us. Anything else, or can I just go ahead and come back from the dead?"

"Well, kinda. Why'd you make Good Dark Dan your Dad figure instead of older brother or something?"

"Well, Dan sounds enough like Dad people wouldn't call us on it, and he looks old enough to be our Dad. As an older brother, he doesn't quite look the part."

"Okay, I guess. Bye Danny, and beware." She hung up abruptly, leaving the Phantom family in light relief.

Which, knowing them, wouldn't last long


	9. Fear Itself

It was dark.

Very dark.

And that is never a very good thing.

So dark, in fact, it was frankly impossible for a normal human to see, even with night-vision goggles. It was so black that all light had simply been sucked out, and only sound and fear could travel here.

However, if you had been able to see, if you had some strange see-in-the-dark power, and you looked around this room, you STILL wouldn't see anything. Because there was nothing there.

Except, as I mentioned before, fear.

And with the arrival of a singular visitor, Vlad Plasmius.

"Has it been done?" A low voice that could hardly be described as a voice at all and not just the beginnings of an earthquake spoke slowly, annunciating. It was disturbing to listen to, to be near, but Vlad didn't so much as tremble.

"Not yet, my liege, but the preparations have been made and the plan is in motion. Our enemy will be experiencing his own personal hell, and will soon make a perfect vessel for you."

"Excellent." The voice began to laugh. It was a cold laugh, without happiness, simply spite and cruelty and such fear-inducing shivers sent along with it that I, myself, am quite surprised Vlad didn't faint dead away then and there.

But Vlad had a plan.

Which you saw coming, yes, and it does involve helping the thing stronger than himself and then stabbing it in the back, and no, it doesn't have any special qualities that make it as though destiny itself had decided that I needed to add a little spice to my already-too-large plot.

It's just a plan.

But Vlad also has a plan B.

And I won't tell you whether or not destiny had any particular hand in THIS plan, just that it was really very, simple considering this is Vlad we're talking about. I could hand you mountains of papers that explained what this plan entailed, but I can tell you right now that it all depended on one, very simple, very small, very fragile and delicate, someone.

And that someone, so help us all, would have to stand up to the challenge.

**Viola!**

**Another chapter, this time starring Vlad and his new 'Master'!**

**I hope it's long enough for you guys. I just couldn't think of any ways to write out a super-long chapter while keeping up a vaguely creepy feeling and without giving away any secrets.**

**Though you'd have to be pretty darn oblivious to miss some of the things hidden in here.**

**Any ideas as to where the next chapter ought to go? OR if there are any loose ends that I need to wrap up from the other chapters?**

**But moving onto to something that's been weighing heavily on my mind.**

**I attend school. I have classes separate from each other, and each one is a different subject, Simple deal here, right?**

**I have a friend that's a guy (I'm female) and that, since I don't have any classes with him this year, I only see at lunch. I don't have ANY romantic feelings of any sort for this guy, and my relationship is purely platonic. Our conversations consist mostly of Marvel, DC and Pokémon.**

**He's been sitting closer to me than usual, right up next to me, in fact, even though he knows I get scared when I get closed in. I've started putting my enormous book bag in-between us, to discourage this, but it's not really helping. He still leans over my shoulder as I read or do extra work. Sometimes he even flips the pages of my book for me, and it's making me really uncomfortable.**

**Today he told me that 'I wasn't like other girls' and that I 'was a really good . . . friend'.**

**I don't exactly want to cut him off, as he only has one other friend and other than that he only talks to his mother and I, he said so himself, and I wouldn't want to close him off or anything.**

**But I DO NOT want to be in any other sort of relationship with him. Heck, I have a fear of touching other people, let alone holding hands or hugging or ANYTHING! And especially not with him- I consider him a brother.**

**I tried hiding out in the bathroom or in the office during lunch, but he comes looking for me.**

**My other friends, who I also sit with during lunch, find it cute and think we should get together. They all seem to think he's had a crush on me for years even though we've only been sitting at lunch with each other for a few months.**

**What do I do?**

**Geez- this makes me sound like a total wimp and that I'm writing to an advice column while holding back tears, but it has been making me loose focus on class work, so this does need to be remedied, and soon.**

**P.S.-I have a scar running down my left thumb now. I have no idea where it came from.**

**P.P.S.-That was really off topic.**

**P.P.P.S.-Please don't leave hate comments.**

**P.P.P.P.S.- Please doesn't say that you're the guy I'm writing about here. You'll give me a heart attack or something.**

**P.P.P.P.P.S.-Unless you are the guy. Tell me so I can leave the country.**


	10. Gravestones and Pizzazz

"Hello?"

The door creaked open. A smallish teenage boy with black hair and a grimace stepped inside the large and empty house. A young girl, maybe just getting into her teens, followed him, with blue eyes that shone into the dark. An older figure stood outside, slightly nervous and a little more than anxious at the sudden turn of events. The family dog sat next him, scratching its ear.

You guessed it.

The Phantom Family was investing a very serious case: One of vast importance. A mission so vitally important it could very well change the course of history. More specifically, whether or not the two youngest could make it into Fenton Works without setting off any alarms, then turning off the alarms in order to let the older two in.

But, of course, even given the pair's horrible bad luck, a no-brainer knows no karma and they made it into the Fenton OPS Center safely.

"So, I guess we're just gonna wait for Jazz and the others to get here, right?" Dani asked, petting Cujo. She was sitting farthest from the window, enjoying the only reclining chair in the Center. Danny sat on a bucket next to the window, also in human form. He looked down at the street.

"Yep. And given that Jazz drives like Dad, she should be here right . . . now." The Fenton Assault Vehicle skidded around the corner. It flew down the road, did a dime-turn into the driveway, and stopped so jarringly Danny could feel the whiplash from his vantage point, four stories above.

Tucker and Sam leapt out and kissed the ground.

Jazz knelt next to them, scolding them, but Danny could see she was secretly patting the ground on her other side. Perhaps her driving abilities weren't a conscious choice. . ? Woah. Wait. Sounding way to much like Jazz right now. He watched, quietly, as the three pulled themselves off the ground and headed into the house, then turned to the ghosties behind him.

"They're here. Any last words?"

Dan scratched the back of his neck, and, watching him, Danny realized that he'd been doing it too.

They dropped their hands just as Dani spoke. "Danny, I want a gravestone that looks like Cujo." She ruffled the fur in between the dogs' ears, and he rolled over for a belly rub. "I'm just saying."

Dan grinned, "And I want my gravestone to be one of those huge brick things that look like they could jump up and kill somebody." Then he sighed. "But I'm a little jealous. I mean, we're sitting here in your attic discussing what we want our gravestones to be and all the while we know you're going to be just fine."

Danny gaped, thinking back to all those times he hadn't quite dodged Sam's wrath.

Dan must've caught his look, because he laughed and began to explain.

"Think about it, kiddo. Us? We're cool as all get out, but you've got an advantage I'm pretty sure neither of us will ever have with Sam." He looked over at Dani, and she nodded, agreeing. Danny just cocked his head.

"You can't be serious. What on earth do I have that you guys don't?"

Dan just glanced over at Dani, who answered for him.

"Pizzazz."

Clueless as ever, Danny was about to question his doubtful levels of pizzazz when Sam burst in through the door.

"DANIEL JAMES FENTON!"

**Hey guys.**

**Yeah, I suck, I know, I've been a total jerk-bag with the not updating or anything.**

**It's just that even though I know exactly how I want this to end, I can't piece together a plausible way for them to get to that point. All I've gotten so far just looks like chicken-scratch.**

**So this is the unfortunate remains of long hours of editing. I hope you all like it.**

**Because really, I'm terrified of disappointing you guys. Honest! My day totally bites and I log in and read all your review and suddenly I'm walking on sunshine. You guys aren't rock stars or fire fighters or anything, but you're certainly celebrities to me.**

**I want to thank you for all your advice considering the boy problem I had. It really was helpful, really truly, and I'm glad I happened to read all of your comments before the 'Incident'. He followed me around. All day. He was never farther than five feet away all day, and it made me freakishly uncomfortable, as you guys can probably imagine. My friends finally helped me out and dragged him off to do something else and I don't know what they said to him, but it must've worked because we're now happily back to our platonic best-buddyship. **

**But I've got another problem! Hopefully you guys will make some magic and help me out with what to do. A really old friend of mine, who I've known since I moved here five years ago, has been acting like a total jerk. After a fight with another one of my friends in December she stopped being her carefree, intelligent self and has been acting like- well- like the Box Ghost! Persistent in her grouchiness. She's been okay to me, even though she's been acting out towards my other friends, and since they've been going to the counselor a lot, so I thought the problem was solved. I thought wrong, as usual. The friend she had a fight with is my partner (And also a close friend) on this huge science project that all of my free time for the past week has gone into. And, to get back at the friend, she wrecked our project.**

**It's not certain she did it- there's a very slight chance it wasn't her, and that's what I'm hoping for- but my friend instantly thought it was her when we went in to check on it after school. Apparently it's a lot worse than I thought, and it's gotten to my old friend trying to tear apart my partner's life from the inside out.**

**Yikes, my life sounds like a cartoon, but this is building up to something I'm not sure I want to be a part of. HELP!**


End file.
